Chapter Forty-four

Zoey excitedly took the package from the messenger.  She rushed over to Alex, who was lounging on the couch where they had been watching a movie only moments before.  It had been three months of seeing each other whenever possible.  This time he’d been in New York for a rare two nights in a row.  He would have to leave early in the morning to go back to DC, but for now, it almost seemed like a normal long lover’s weekend. It was so great to have him around the house. 

“It’s here!” she exclaimed, jumping on the couch next to him.

“Open it,” he smiled at her.

She ripped open the extra large padded envelope and slid the hardcover book from inside it.   The cover was a splash of glossy blue sky with the golden turrets and white marble of the Cathedral of Christ the Savior. Zoey grinned at Alex and they thumbed through the pages of her book together.  She was so happy. It had turned out so lovely. Alex was very interested in seeing the places that he had not been able to see with her.  Zoey did not linger long on the page of Matthias Church in Budapest. The picture was lovely, but dim and the church, shrouded in mist. It portrayed a gloom that she did not want to remember. 

“It is beautiful book, Zoey,” he said smiling at her.

She took it from him with a smile and turned back to the beginning just after the title page.  She placed the dedication page before him.

For the man who opened my eyes to the sunlight before I was aware my world was dim.

He looked up at her. She smiled at him and took his face in her hands.

“I had to travel half way around the world to find you, only to lose you again. And I would do it again in a heartbeat. Being with you now makes everything worth it, Alex. Я люблю тебя.”

He smiled at her a little surprised. “I love you, too, Kroshka.”

She kissed his soft lips.  He lay the book down aside and wrapped his strong arms around her, pulling her across his lap, kissing her in return.  She loved being cradled in his arms, loved feeling his big hands against her skin. His eyes lingered on hers momentarily and then he sat her up and stood. He held his hand to her. She took it and when she got to her feet, he swept her up in his arms and carried her off to the bedroom, their movie completely forgotten.

The sunlight peering in through her window was beginning to rouse her from sleep. Alex had left quite early, kissing her good-bye and insisting she go back to sleep. After two days of waking up in his arms, it was a little bittersweet to wake up without him, but she’d never been so happy. She had everything she ever wanted.  She never imagined being able to love someone so much and have him love her in the same way.  She reached out and pulled his pillow close to her. Just the simple smell of him made her smile.  She knew when she opened her eyes that the nesting doll would be sitting on the bedside table.  He had left it for her every time he had to go away, without fail. What he hid inside it wasn’t really important. She knew that it was there and it always would be.

The end.

Chapter Forty-three

She was lying there nestled in his arms, her favorite place in all the world.  She couldn’t remember ever being so happy. She played with the velvety soft hair on his chest. She had not forgotten how much she loved to run her fingers across his beautiful body. She felt his fingers in her hair and knew that he had not fallen asleep. She kissed his chest and took a deep breath. She sat up and their eyes met.

“So, what now?” she asked quietly.

He grinned at her and raised his eyebrows.

“We could do it again,” he suggested.

She laughed at him and shook her head.

“That is not what I meant.”

“I will be in New York next week,” he said, clearly knowing exactly what she was referring to. “We have two games, Rangers and New Jersey Devils. You think you have time for me then?”

He brushed the hair away from her face and he closed her eyes as his fingers touched her cheek.

“I will have time,” she whispered, leaning in to kiss his soft lips.  She looked into his eyes, a slight fear stole over her. “Alex, are you sure?  I am still not Russian, you know.”

“Zoey,” he breathed. “There were many things that Olga told you that are not true. But, I will not lie to you. Many people will not like it that you are not Russian,” he sighed. “Maybe even my family. But I love you.  I have learned what it is like to live without you.  I will not be without you anymore. Not if you love me.”

“I do, Alex. I love you with all of my heart, with all that I am.  I will not be without you either.”

With a quick smile and a kiss, he lay her back down on the bed again.

A vibrating buzz surprised them from the nightstand.  Zoey’s phone was alerting her to a text message. Zoey reached over and grabbed the phone.

“Oh, my God!” she exclaimed.

“What?”

“Madison! She is coming back to the hotel! It is later than I thought!”

Zoey scrambled out of the bed and furiously began pulling her clothes on.  Alex grinned, lying back on his pillow with his hands linked behind his head.

“Alex, get dressed!”

“What is hurry? Come back to bed.”

“No, Alex. She will be here any minute! Get dressed!”

“Why? She will know what we have been doing anyway,” he smirked at her.

Zoey’s eyes narrowed at him. “Because, you are the sexiest man I have ever seen. And I will not have my best friend see you in bed like that.”

He laughed and she sat back down on the bed, grazing her fingers across his chest.

“That is for me.”

Chapter Forty-two

Her arms were around his neck before she knew what she was doing. His lips were still as soft as she remembered. He brushed her hair back from her face and his palms were warm on her damp cheeks. Her heart was soaring again as she kissed him over and over again. 

“Please, forgive me, Alex. I should have told you in Moscow. I should have told you how much I loved you. I was afraid. I’m so sorry.”

He shushed her quietly, wiping away her tears.

“Простите. I am sorry,” he said, enveloping her in his arms. “I was afraid, too.”

She looked up at him, grinning through her tears. “You are not afraid of anything.”

“Dat not true, Kroshka,” he said shaking his head.  “I never knew I could want something so much or hurt so bad when you were gone.”

He brushed the last tear from her face.  “I am still afraid.”

“You do not have to be. I love you, Alex,” she brushed her fingers across his lips, her tears threatening to fall again. “My heart is yours.”

His lips were on hers again, his body pressing hers against the door.  She fumbled with the doorknob and they nearly fell inside the room. He laughed and whisked her up into his arms.  He carried her to the bed and lay her gently against the pillow, his kisses never ceasing.  She felt as if her heart were finally beating again, that somehow the world was brighter once again. He loved her. She could hardly believe it. He kissed her neck just the way he’d always kissed it, the way he still did in her dreams.  He lay down next to her on the bed, his hand brushing across her trembling stomach.

“Alex,” she whispered, “this is real, isn’t it?”

“Yes, Kroshka, it is. Because I can feel your heart beating and your breath on my cheek. I can feel the softness of your skin and the goose bumps that rise when I run my fingers across it.  I can feel your hands on my back and your lips on my neck. It is very real.”

She kissed him hard, lifting up his shirt and sliding her hands across his chest. He sat up and pulled the shirt over his head. The sight of his chest wakened such longing inside her. The smell of him, the softness of his lips on her skin, the warmth of his touch, it was all she wanted for the last several months. She was trembling all over as he began unbuttoning her blouse. She was finding it quite difficult to breathe.  Then he was kissing her again. His kisses were like a spring rain after months of drought. Her whole body was coming to life again. The clothes were coming off quickly now until finally, she felt the weight of him on top of her. His arms cradled her beneath her shoulders and his hands were entwined in her hair.  She ran her fingers across the powerful muscles in his back and up his shoulders.  His kisses were soft and gentle. She found herself drowning in the deep blue pools of his eyes as he entered her.

“Я люблю тебя, Zoey,” he whispered softly against her lips as he pressed deeper and deeper inside her.  “I love you.”

His voice was deep and musical. Everything he said she heard as a symphony, as strong and powerful as if Mussorgsky himself had written them. This was where she belonged, with him.  It didn’t matter where they were. She was with him. She was home.

Chapter Forty-one

“Okay, so Danielle and I will be checking out the Mall after lunch,” Madison said, gathering a few things and tossing them into her purse.  “I’ll be gone most of the day.”

“I wanted to do all that, too, you know,” Zoey said, feeling guilty. “I should have said no.”

Madison smiled at her.  “Honey, you have a second chance. They don’t come along very often. Of course, you should have said yes.”

Zoey looked up at her friend and offered her a weak smile. 

“I know you are scared, Zoey. But he’s worth it isn’t he? Besides, maybe he’s just a little scared too.”

Zoey laughed. She couldn’t imagine Alex would be scared of anything. She embraced her friend.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” grinned Madison as she left the hotel room.

“That’s not saying much!” Zoey called after her with a laugh.

Zoey sat on the edge of the bed, waiting. Her nerves were not calmed by Madison’s wisdom.  The clock moved so slowly.  The television remote was in her hand and she thumbed through channels trying to distract herself. There were at least 40 channels available here at the hotel.  There was nothing interesting on any of them.  Zoey sighed and pushed the power button, turning the set off.  She glanced in the mirror and adjusted a rebellious wave back behind her ear. She wrung her hands with impatience and looked down at them.  They were clammy. She rubbed her palms on her jeans.  She stood and walked across the room to the window. She was reaching to pull back the curtain when there was a knock at the door. She caught her breath. She crossed to the door, let out the breath and opened it.

“Hello Zoey.”

“Hi,” she managed to squeak.

He held out his hand to her. “Ready?”

She slowly placed her hand in his and nodded.  She was going, but she wasn’t really sure she was ready.

Lunch was Five Guys Burgers and Fries. It was so good. The burgers were charbroiled and the fries were seasoned with Cajun spices.  It was fun. There were plenty of people around the small restaurant, a few of them even approached and asked for Alex’s autograph. But for the most part, they were able to make the place their own.  They sat in the corner and lost themselves in conversation. He chatted about his life in Washington DC. She talked about her work on the book and the process she had to go through once the pictures were done.  The time flew by unnoticed by either of them.  She couldn’t stop looking at his face. He was just the same. His mouth, his chin, his beautiful eyes – none of it was different.  He was still so beautiful. His smile still made her heart jump. Before she realized it, they were back at her hotel room door.

“Dis seems familiar,” Alex said with a smile and placed his hand on the door over her shoulder. “Can I come in?”

“Alex,” she protested, placing her hands against his chest.  It was very familiar, but her heart was already crying.  She closed her eyes, but she couldn’t keep her face from showing the pain she was in.  It took all her strength not to break down in tears.

“I can’t, Alex.”

He pulled away from her. She was surprised at the amount of pain she saw on his face. 

“I’m sorry, Alex,” a rebellious tear began to slide down her cheek. “I just can’t. I won’t survive watching you leave again.”

Alex stepped back. He turned and started to walk away down the hall, but stopped. He spoke to her without turning around.

“I went back Zoey,” she watched his shoulders expand as he took a breath. “I went back and you were gone.”

His words hit her hard as if she’d actually been physically struck. 

“W-what do you mean you went back? W-why? Why Alex?”

It was only then that he turned around and walked back to her.  His eyes were so sad. He brushed the tear from her cheek.

“Don’t you know, Kroshka?” he whispered, lifting her chin.

“Why Alex?” she searched his face.

“Because I loved you, Kroshka,” he looked deep into her eyes.  “I still do.”

Chapter Forty

Zoey and Madison followed the security guard through the bowels of Verizon Center at a brisk pace.  Madison was quiet, or if she wasn’t, Zoey didn’t hear her. She was thumbing the plastic locker room pass that hung around her neck, lost in her thoughts and memories.  The man she saw on the ice today was very much the man she met in Moscow, but somehow even more.  He was dangerous when he was on the ice. She was surprised at the way he threw his body into other players.  She knew he was strong and his opponent usually got the worst of such confrontations. She recognized the competitiveness in him, but when he was playing hockey it was like a raging fire. She caught the eyes of some of the defenders and the goalie. They were afraid of him. He exploited that fear.  But then during a break in play, she saw him talking with one of the players from the other team and he laughed.  He was just Alex when he laughed, but the minute the puck dropped all friendships ended.  She found herself wondering how many friendships were suspended during play, only to reappear after the game was over.

The door to the locker room opened. She could hear the sounds of celebration inside. She took a deep breath and held it.   It was just like the first time she saw him in a suit. He looked incredibly handsome even though his hair was wet. He smiled and walked over to her.  Then he was embracing her, kissing her cheeks, calling her name and she was swimming with emotions. 

“Hello Alex,” she said as he released her. “Congratulations.”

“It was good game.  Was your first?”

“Yes, it was quite an experience.”

“I am glad we could win it for you. Dis your friend?”

“Oh yes,” Zoey flushed. “This is Madison.”

Alex shook her hand. Madison was surprisingly quiet for the first time Zoey could remember. She seemed a bit star-struck.

“Book done?” asked Alex. She felt his eyes moving over her.

“Oh, yes, soon. It’s at the printers now. It took a long time, but I’m very happy with it.”

“You look beautiful, Zoey,” he said and their eyes met.

“I found the swans, Alex,” she said and watched the smile grow wide across his face. “I’m sorry I didn’t find them sooner.”

“You just find them?”

“Yes, I-” she hesitated. She didn’t want to tell him that she hadn’t even been able to remove the dolls from her luggage. She didn’t want him to know that it hurt too much to remember him. The door to the locker room swung open again, rescuing her from her discomfort. Zoey clearly heard her friend gasp. She glanced toward the doorway.  She saw a young man. He was not as tall as Alex. His head was all golden blond curls, wet and combed back behind his ears.  He walked over to them. Zoey could see that he had delicate features.  His lips were plump and rosy like that of a cherub. His eyes were a curious shade of green because they weren’t really green. They were golden.  It was the only color that Zoey could think of to describe them. 

“Dis Nick,” Alex said, referring to his friend and made introductions. Nick shook each of their hands and greeted them. His voice was not as deep as Alex’s either. He seemed much younger, but Zoey knew that Alex was younger than he looked, so it was possible that they were closer in age than they looked.  Zoey could almost feel Madison’s excitement next to her.  She managed to say hello and made a comment about one of Nick’s assists. He smiled at her and Zoey wasn’t sure her friend was even breathing. Nick looked at his friend in a silent communication.

“I have plans tonight, but would you meet me for lunch tomorrow?” Alex asked, holding Zoey’s hand in his.

She looked up into his eyes, the same eyes that had captured her so many months ago and she couldn’t refuse.

Chapter Thirty-nine

He scored again before the first intermission. Zoey was so excited. She didn’t even remember seeing much of the other players. Every time he was on the ice, her eyes were on him.   The only one she even noticed was number 19. He seemed to be Alex’s partner by the way they played.

“They don’t have partners, Zoey,” scoffed Madison.  “They have line-mates and there are five on the line, two defensemen and 3 forwards.  Number 19 is Nicklas Backstrom. He’s the center forward. He’s the boss on the ice.”

“Alex is not the boss?” Zoey asked in shock.

“No, Alex is a left wing. He doesn’t drive the play. Nick does.  But Alex is the playmaker.  He’s the big star. Alex makes things happen.”

A fan moved toward them and Zoey had to shift her weight to let him pass. Intermission was a bustle of energy. It was seventeen minutes of chatter and commotion and anticipation. People were moving about going to concessions, meeting with friends that they only see at the games. Zoey enjoyed looking around Verizon Center and taking it all in.  She looked all around the stands. Most people were excited and happy. She saw a great deal of red jerseys, but also more white jerseys or blue jerseys supporting the opponents, the New York Rangers, than she thought would be there.  There was a couple sitting a few rows behind them.  He wore a Washington jersey and she wore a Rangers jersey.  She found herself wondering now their evening might end up depending on the outcome of the game. She glanced up to the top of the stairs and noticed a very large man coming toward them. He was in a suit, but he had the look of security. He moved with a purpose. He held his head high and took in his surroundings. He finally stopped at the row where Zoey and Madison were sitting. 

“Are you Miss Simmons? Zoey Simmons?”

“Yes,” Zoey answered slowly. bewildered.

“Mr. Ovechkin would like you to join him for a few minutes after the game.”  He pulled out two passes on lanyards and handed them to Zoey.  Zoey looked up at him openmouthed.  Madison squealed.

“If you will wait here after the game, I will come escort you to the locker room.”

“T-thank you,” she finally said. Madison took the second pass from Zoey and squealed again.

“I can’t believe it!  I get to meet Nick, oh my God, Zoey!”  She threw her arms around her friend in a quick embrace and began to chatter again.

Zoey didn’t know why she was surprised by this. It was just like Alex. It was something so insignificant for him to do, but it would normally be out of her reach.  Madison was so excited.  But Zoey got nervous all over again. Seeing him was wonderful. Watching him play was amazing, but the idea of actually standing in front of him again was a little unnerving. Her heart was beginning to soar again.  

Chapter Thirty Eight

He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. After all this time, there she was, just sitting there watching him.  Her eyes were wide, clearly surprised that he actually saw her.  Then she smiled.  A flood of memories washed over him. 

“Ovi!” Nick called to him, clearly frustrated.  Alex recovered the misplayed puck and shot it back to his teammate. He joined the back of the warm-up line. Nick skated over to him.

“What was that?”

“She here.”

“What? Who?” asked Nick, bewildered by his captain’s loss of focus.

“Zoey.” Alex stared at the stands. Nick turned to look at the section that held Alex’s attention and spotted a brunette at the glass that resembled the picture he discovered in his friend’s kitchen.

“Okay, she’s here. But we still have a game to play. Look at me,” Nick ordered. 

Alex’s gaze turned from the stands to his line-mate.  Nick watched him smile and then his focus returned.  At that point, Nick knew they would win the game, that Alex would take the opportunity to show off and they would all reap the rewards of his excitement.

He positioned himself on the outside of the faceoff circle. The sounds of the arena were muted until there was nothing but the sound of his own heart beating. There were ten of them all frozen and poised as the puck was released from the referee’s grasp.  A shared breath was inhaled, muscles contracted, eyes focused. The puck hit the ice, stick hit the puck and the players exploded in a flurry of motion.  Hockey was a very fast game. It was all about anticipation. He had to expect to see the puck on his stick before it was actually there. If he didn’t, he’d be two steps behind the whole time. Alex was never surprised to see it and this time was no different. He was off like a rocket almost before it was there.  He beat his defenseman by a fraction of a second, more than enough time to exploit the situation. Once he was a step ahead, there were very few who could overtake him.  There was no better feeling than being on a breakaway, leaving the rest behind. It was a duel between him and the goalie. A quick move to the left and Alex caught the goalie committing to his position. He hesitated slightly and crossed in front of the net and caught the defeated look on the goalie’s face as the puck flew just over his left shoulder.

Verizon Center erupted with a roar of cheers. It was alive, with its own pulse, its own collective breath.  Everyone was on their feet as his teammates tackled Alex in a triumphant embrace.  The goal music played.  Fans danced in the stands. It was electric and contagious.  Zoey had never experienced anything like it.  She was on her feet with all the rest. She was searching the pile of red sweaters on the ice until he emerged and skated to the bench bumping fists with all his teammates in congratulations. The smile on his face was like nothing she’d seen before.  It was pure joy and triumph.  His eyes drifted to her and she was overwhelmed with desire to jump into his arms. She placed her hand on the glass in front of her and watched until they were set up in the face-off circle again before joining the rest of the fans back in their seats. 

Chapter Thirty Seven

“Ovechkin?  You’re telling me that the Alex you spent two weeks with in Moscow is Alexander Ovechkin?”  Madison asked incredulously, clicking through the pictures on Zoey’s computer.  After recovering from the discovery of the figurine, Zoey had confessed everything to her friend.  Now two days later, she still repeated his name in disbelief. Zoey, stuck in the car with her for the last three hours, was beginning to get annoyed by it. She almost liked it better when Madison had gotten mad at Zoey for holding out on her.

Madison had talked her into going to Washington to see a game.  It was an exciting idea for Zoey, but she was nervous.  The swans clearly meant he would be thinking of her. But that was five months ago. She couldn’t expect him to still be thinking of her now.   But the chance to see his face again was too much and Zoey had agreed. She’d changed her mind three times on the drive. The last hour, she’d decided she would stay at the hotel and not join Madison at the game. She’d finally found a place where her dreams weren’t filled with him and she should just leave it alone.  Of course, that was before the swans, she reminded herself.  She’d dreamt of him each night since she discovered the treasure.

She gripped the wheel of her Acura TSX a little tighter. The traffic on the I-45 was getting a little heavy.  Zoey hated driving in heavy traffic. In Manhattan, almost everything she needed was within walking distance and if not, there was always the subway. The only time she really had to deal with traffic was when she had to venture outside the city.  Her palms were getting sweaty. She was already nervous enough. She didn’t need traffic.  Madison was chattering non-stop next to her.  She was terribly excited to introduce Zoey to hockey. She’d been so excited about her friend in DC getting her seats at the glass.

“You never get seats at the glass this close to the game. These seats are always gone right away. I can’t believe how lucky we were that Danielle couldn’t use her tickets.  Zoey, you just don’t understand.  The stars must be aligned for something special.  Maybe we’ll see a hat-trick!  How great would that be for your first game?”

Zoey barely heard her.  She registered the hat-trick comment, even someone with her limited knowledge of hockey knew that a hat trick was three goals by the same player in the same game. She also knew that they were very hard to accomplish. Alex had explained it to her. He only has ten of them in his whole career.  Zoey remembered thinking that seemed like a lot, but then she remember that hockey played eighty-two games a year.  Alex had played several hundred games in his career.

“Oh, shit,” she exclaimed, pressing on the brake, as a flashy, brand new Camaro slipped in front of her on its way weaving through traffic. “Dumb ass,” she grumbled under her breath, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter.

“You want me to drive for a while?” Madison offered.

“Letting you drive would not help my nerves any more than letting Alex drive!”

“Oh, really?  Does he really drive crazy like the tabloids say?” asked Madison. She was so eager to hear any little tidbit about Alex. Zoey understood that it was so exciting for her, but each question brought up a memory that Zoey wasn’t sure she wanted to linger over.

Zoey sighed. “Of course not.  He drives fast, yes. But he is safe.”  

Her mind wandered to the day he drove her to his dacha.  The wind coming in from the open window ruffled his hair. She recalled his mischievous smile as he revved the engine.  Was she falling even then?

She finally had to admit to herself that the fall began the first time she looked into his blue eyes.

Chapter Thirty-six

Madison stepped quickly inside and started shedding her winter accoutrements, chattering a mile a minute when Zoey opened the door to her Tribeca loft.  She was telling Zoey of her blind-date the night before.  Zoey just smiled, knowing her friend would chatter on incessantly until she felt that she had Zoey caught up on everything that had happened since the last time they saw each other. It had been a quite a while since she had spent any real time with Madison. After returning home from Europe, Zoey had been completely immersed in meetings with her publisher and editor. They constantly vacillated between which pictures would be included in the book and what part of the history of each church should be added.  After more time than Zoey had ever thought possible, the book was finally sent to the printers.  Now she could take a few days, turn off her cell phone and relax.  And she intended to do just that.

“And he didn’t even remember my name! It was absolutely the worst date in my entire life!”

Zoey snickered and received a glare from her friend in return. 

“I’m sorry, Maddy. It sounds dreadful,” she grinned. “At least, he didn’t pressure you to come inside.”

The look of horror that passed over Madison’s face completely did her in. She burst out laughing, unable to contain herself. After a short moment, Madison joined her.

“You just wait,” she said. “You’ll get yours soon enough. We’ll find you a real special guy.”

“Oh, no,” Zoey laughed. “We absolutely will not. There’s not a man in Manhattan that I am remotely interested in dating.”

“Aw, come on, I’m sure we can find you someone.  How about that guy…”

“No, no, no!”

“Really, now, Zoey,” her friend’s voice grew serious, “you can’t go on living on memories of this Alex guy.  It’s time you got back out there.”

Zoey’s smile faded. She had told her best friend about the man she met in Moscow.  She had only left out his last name.  Madison actually followed hockey.  She held season tickets for the New York Rangers games here at the Garden.  She would know who he was.  She had surely seen him play. Zoey wasn’t sure why she didn’t tell her really. Perhaps it would make it harder if Madison actually knew the man who broke her heart.  Or perhaps, Madison would hound her even more to go to a hockey game with her. 

“Come on. Are you ready for lunch?” Zoey asked, ignoring her friend.

“Yes, I’m starved!”

Zoey grabbed her coat.

“Oh wait, let me grab that suitcase while I’m here. You know I will forget it if I don’t.”

Zoey led her to the closet in the spare bedroom and retrieved the suitcase. Madison was going on a week long trip to visit her family in North Carolina. She has asked to borrow the luggage to carry gifts for her nieces and nephews.

“Zoey, there is something in here,” Madison said, shaking the suitcase. She opened it and discovered a Nesting Doll.

“You didn’t tell me you got some of these. This one is cute. It’s a bear.” 

Zoey had forgotten that she’d left them in the case.  Madison opened each doll like an excited child and exclaimed as reached the last.

“What’s this? I thought there were just dolls.”

“There are only dolls. The last one doesn’t open.”

Zoey took the tiny velvet bag from her friend, perplexed.  She shook the contents into her open palm.  It was a pair of tiny white swans, a hand-made glass figurine from St. Petersburg.  Madison dropped the doll she was holding as Zoey burst into tears.

Chapter Thirty-five

It was cold in Washington DC. It was a little unseasonable for the end November.  There had been small amount of snow on the ground this morning, left from flurries over night. It disappeared quite quickly when the sun rose.  The last week had been below freezing and the media acted as if the whole city was frozen.  Alex just laughed. Though he has become accustomed to the mild winters in the District, he was still reminded of home when the rare instance of cold occurred.  He looked forward to December when the snow would actually stay on the ground for more than a couple of days. He sipped his coffee and stretched out on his long leather couch. It was an off day for the team.  They were twenty-three games into the eighty-two game season and had just finished an out-of-town stretch of three games over a week in Florida and Texas.  It was nice to be home. And he was more than happy to welcome any cold after experiencing November in the South. To Alex it was still summer down there. There was supposed to be snow in November, not 85 degrees.  They had won in Florida, first against the Panthers and then against the Lightning in overtime. They did not fare so well in Texas, as Dallas sniper Loui Eriksson rifled one in the net with 5 seconds left to put the Stars up 3-2.  Texas left a bad taste in Alex’s mouth.  They only played them once a season. He had been very annoyed at this loss.  The Capitals were 17-6-2 so far in the season.  It was a really good start for them. They were healthy and strong and everything seemed to be going right.  

There was a knock on the door. He sat up and winced.  There was a twinge in his right knee.  It was commonplace for him to have aches and pains. Hockey is a tough sport. He had taken a hard hit yesterday from one of the Stars defensemen. He hadn’t been knocked to the ice, but in bracing himself for the hit, he tweaked the knee slightly.  It had not kept him from finishing the game, but it was slightly swollen today. He made his way to the door. His team mate, Nicklas Backstrom was waiting impatiently on the porch.

“Man, you are not even dressed,” he said annoyed, but not really surprised.

“What? What time it is?”

“It’s 12:30, go get dressed, we have to be there at 1:30. You will make us late.”

Alex smiled at his friend. Nick hated to be late, but he was overreacting. It would not take them more than half an hour to get to the zoo.  They were meeting defensemen John Carlson and Karl Alzner there. Carlson was bringing his niece and nephew which always proved to be an adventure for Alex.  He and Carlson had a brotherly relationship. He was 5 years younger than Alex and had just finished his rookie year with the Capitals. Carlson reminded Alex of himself as a rookie. And John responded to Alex’s child-like enthusiasm with his own.  There were more than a few pranks pulled on each other in the locker room, but that wasn’t limited to Carlson. The whole team was like a band of brothers. They did many things together away from the ice.  Backstrom was a great contrast to Carlson. He was serious, quiet, Swedish. To Alex, Swedish was the only description that was needed.  It summed his friend up perfectly. Swedish meant reserved and respectful. He was also the center, which meant that he used his brain more in the game than anyone else. Centers ran everything, so they had to be more strategic than reactionary. Alex could sometimes imagine the gears working in Nick’s mind as he thought three and four steps ahead. Nick did enjoy having fun with the team, but he was usually the one along for the ride as opposed to the instigator. He was quick to laugh though and Alex considered him his best friend on the team.

“I drive. We will not be late,” Alex assured his friend.

“How many times do I have to tell you? I will not get into a car with you,” Nick laughed.

“Chicken.”

Alex headed upstairs to dress and Nick called after him, “And brush your hair!”

Nick laughed at the Russian expletive that float down to him as Alex disappeared.  He helped himself to a cup of coffee in the kitchen and accidentally knocked some papers off the counter.  He bent down to pick them up and several pictures fell from an envelope at the bottom of the pile. He gathered them up and thumbed through them perplexed.  They were of Alex and a girl that Nick had never met. There were several of them laughing that looked as if Alex were holding the camera up himself to take the picture. There were a few of the girl alone by a lake or pond. She was smiling up at him in one. She looked very happy. They had to be from this summer. Alex looked very much the same in them.  Nick wondered why his friend had not mentioned this girl.

Alex bounded down the steps in jeans and a red Capitals sweatshirt, his hair still unruly. His smile faded a bit when he saw what Nick was holding.

“Who is this?”

“You a nosey Swede, you know?”

“You never mentioned her. Why? Who is she?”

“That is Zoey,” Alex said quietly, taking the pictures from his friend. He smiled slightly, remembering the day at the Summer Garden of Peter the Great.  He had talked Zoey into giving him her camera for a few minutes. He had taken pictures of her and then wrestled with her when she tried to get the camera back. She ended up beneath him on the grass, her laughter turning into that beautiful smile as she looked up at him.  He couldn’t keep from kissing her then. His heart was very full that day.

“Zoey? That doesn’t sound Russian,” Nick said, interrupting the memory.

“It’s not.”

Chapter Thirty four

New York was hot in September.  It was still as loud and crowded as ever, like it was alive. The people moved about like worker ants on their way to whatever queen might be their destination.  The long black limousine pulled up to the Smythe Tribeca.  Alex emerged from it in a graphic black tee and jeans, sporting flip flops.  Viktor Andreev, his media liason, joined him and opened the door to the hotel. A pretty young woman with long blonde hair approached them extending her hand first to Alex and then to Viktor. She led them to the elevator, chattering about the photo shoot.  She led them to the Penthouse and introduced Alex to the photographer du jour, Don Painter.

“Nice to meet you, Alex.  I’m excited to be working with you today. Man, you are a big guy.”

Alex smiled. He’d heard that often enough. It usually meant that the photographer was hoping he’d had big enough clothes, in this case, a suit.  Painter led Alex to the costumer, who didn’t at all seem concerned about Alex’s size.  She handed him three hangers and shoes and sent him off to get dressed.  Alex assumed that the photographer didn’t know that this suit had been tailored to fit him, or perhaps his comment wasn’t about the suit after all.  He was a big guy. It wasn’t like the played tennis. He played hockey, size helped a bit. Alex laid the suit across the bed and pulled his tee off over his head. He deposited his jeans and shirt across the chair next to the bed.  He pulled on the grey pants and burgundy shirt. He actually liked this suit. After being approached by Hugo Boss, Alex had two suits tailored for himself. He liked the way the jacket fit across his broad shoulders. It was not too tight so he didn’t feel too restricted.

Alex emerged from the bedroom and was ushered to the stylist, who would dust with make-up and fix his hair. He didn’t like this part. If he could get away with it, he would always ask for no make-up. He hated it.  Unfortunately, for this photo shoot, he would have to endure it. Hugo Boss was paying him a lot of money to look good in their suit, it was the least he could do. 

Painter had set up his camera in front of a large half-moon couch. He instructed Alex to sit comfortably. Alex did as he was told and the pretty blonde assistant fussed with the collar of his shirt.  She smiled at him.  She clearly appreciated the suit.  She was very thin, too thin for his taste, but she had a long pretty neck and her smile was sweet.  Still, he was relieved when she stepped back and waited for further instruction from Painter.  She had done nothing to make him uncomfortable, but photo shoots in general were hard for him. 

Painter snapped lots of pictures.  Alex thought he was a very different photographer than Zoey.  She found beauty, recognized it and captured it.  Painter fussed with him constantly, seeming to create the beauty he was looking for. It was hard not to think of Zoey while he was here in New York.  This was her home. She might even be here somewhere. He wasn’t sure when her tour of Europe was over.  He missed her more than he expected to. He missed her smile.  He missed the way she looked at him.  

Painter barked out some more instructions and Alex remember what he was supposed to be doing.  The shoot really didn’t last more than two hours, but it just seemed to drag on forever. The pretty girl made it clear she was interested. Had he been a better mood, he would have taken her to lunch maybe, back to his hotel surely, but today he was just irritated by her.  

He made his way out of the Penthouse as quickly as possible when they were done with him. Viktor seemed puzzled by his friend, but as a good friend, he did not question Alex.

Chapter Thirty-three

The next several days went pretty much the same for Zoey.  She traveled to Germany and photographed the Romanesque Cologne Cathedral in Cologne and the Theatiner Church in Munich. In both cities she wandered the streets, taking pictures of whatever struck her fancy.  She sat at a small table in a terrace café in Munich watching the people go by.  She found herself making up stories to fit their appearance. There were several businessmen. One in particular rushed past her in a blue suit and tie. His face was flushed with color and his shirt and tie seemed so tight that it looked as if they were suffocating him.  He was having an animated conversation on his cell phone and Zoey assumed that this call was the real reason for his red face.  Perhaps he was talking to his boss or maybe his wife. Someone on the other end of the line was clearly displeased with him. He crossed the street hurriedly and for a moment she worried that he might be hit by a car as he was so involved in his call.  The car horn did not seem to phase him in the least and Zoey determined that car horns must be commonplace for him.  A young woman with a baby stroller stopped beside her. She checked her watch and Zoey imagined that she was meeting the father, who must be late.  Zoey could see the child nestled in the stroller. He was small, but chubby with very round little cheeks and thin, blond hair.  He was very interested in his fingers at the moment, his baby bottle discarded beside him. Zoey watched him hold his hand up to his face and move his fingers in and out making a fist.  Zoey figured that he couldn’t be more than 6 months old.  She was enjoying watching him when he stopped making a fist and look directly at her.  His eyes were so blue, it surprised her. He smiled at her and made a sound that must be a baby laugh. She was enchanted by him.  His mother fussed with him and handed him his bottle just as Daddy stepped up to them. He greeted his grumpy wife with a peck on the cheek and then took his turn fussing with the chubby baby. Zoey found herself watching them walk away until they rounded the corner and were out of sight. There were several tables occupied at the café now. It was nearly lunch time. Most of them were businessmen and women who Zoey had always been curious about.  She thought it must take a certain kind of person to do the same job day in and day out. Perhaps they were stronger than her, but she had never been able to master that. She had been lucky to always find something that brought great adventure to her life.

“Zoey!”

She looked up from her coffee to see a man approaching her. A smile covered her face and she rose to greet him.

“Hello, Parker. How’s the new daddy?”

He pulled her into a quick embrace.

“Wonderful! I’ve brought pictures!  Bailey Marie can be quite loud when she wants. Can you still see the circles under my eyes? I think perhaps I will actually get some sleep now!” he laughed.

“And how is Elizabeth handling it?”

“Like a pro. She was born to be a mother!” he exclaimed with pride and brought out the baby pictures.  The first ones were of the child at the hospital. She was so tiny and red that Zoey was alarmed at first, but the next pictures were over the next couple of days and Bailey was a more normal color. She had a small amount of very dark hair and large eyes.

“What color are her eyes?”

“Right now they are brown, but they may change. I don’t think it is likely though. Lizzie has brown eyes and so do both her parents.  They will probably stay brown.”

They chatted about the baby for a few more minutes. Zoey learned that Elizabeth’s mother had come to stay while Parker was gone.

“Works better for both of us, really. I will miss being there, but it is only a short time and I will not miss seeing Pamela,” he said with a snicker.

The waiter stopped at their table and they ordered some lunch.

“Do they not have good food in this country? You have gotten so thin, Zoey. Don’t you like European food?”

“I am not skinny,” she said looking over her loose clothing. “The food is fine here. I guess I haven’t had much of an appetite.”

Parker looked at her perplexed. “You must tell me what I’ve missed. I want to see your pictures.  How was Moscow?”

She swallowed a bit of coffee.

“Moscow was beautiful.”

Chapter Thirty-two

Budapest was beautiful, but it was covered in a gloomy haze that lasted two days.  Zoey had hoped to capture the magnificent towers of Matthias Church against a blue sky.  She had waited until dusk today in hopes that the sun might come out, but it never did.  The street was usually a bustle of activity during the day, but the rain had driven people in. The church was shrouded in a mist that added to its Gothic appearance. The sunset put the towers in an ethereal glow that made a good photograph.  Zoey heard soft singing from inside as evening mass was being held. The sound floated and hung in the air making the lonely street all the more desolate.  She put away her camera and started her walk back to the hotel.  The dampness was getting to her. Her clothes were not actually wet, just damp and heavy and cold.  The mist seemed to seep through them and penetrate her skin, leaving her chilled.  She could hear her footsteps eerily echoing against the buildings and her body shook with a chill unrelated to the cold.  There was a scruffy, black dog in the doorway that she just passed.  He didn’t bark. He just sat there barely acknowledging her presence with a lift of the eyes. He just sat, shivering as she passed by. He served to remind her how alone she was.   Parker was to join her soon, but she hated to have him leave the baby.  She was doing her best on her own. But at times like this, she really missed having someone there to make her feel safe.  Her mind started to wander to the day she and Alex strolled down the streets of Moscow, window shopping, she would call it.  Stop it, she told herself.  It didn’t do her any good to think about him. It only made her feel like a crushing weight descending on her chest.  She pulled her camera bag closer to her and quickened her pace. 

The warm light from the hotel dispelled her discomfort.  The hotel had gothic architecture on the outside, but was minimal contemporary on the inside.  It was not the Hotel National, but it was nice and it was quiet.  The people that she came across there were friendly.  She opened the door to her room and secured it behind her.  It was dim in the room with only the overhead light on. She promptly turned on all the lamps in the room.  She had left the curtains open and she crossed the small room to close them.  She stood for a moment trying to see out into the city, but the darkness and the mist made it impossible.  Closing the curtains made the room seem even smaller.  It was comfortable though and clean and nice and it was very quiet. She didn’t expect the luxury of the Hotel National anyway.  She turned on the television to banish the silence and began downloading her pictures and working on edits and emails. She had lots of photos of Budapest.  She had filled the last two days walking the city. Some of the buildings were still a mystery to her, but she liked the looks of them and they made lovely pictures. 

She sat back in the chair and rubbed her eyes. She looked at her watch. She’d been working on the computer for 2 hours.  The chatter from the television was low and Hungarian so it provided a calming noise without being a distraction. But she was still surprised at how much time had passed.  Her back was aching from sitting in the chair.  She stretched herself out on the full sized bed and stared at the people talking on the TV.  It was some game show. The contestants were running a kind of obstacle course.  It was amusing even though she didn’t understand it.  Her eyes began to get heavy.

She felt his hand take hers.  Hers was almost lost inside his large paw.  She looked up at him and smiled.  He grinned back at her bashfully.  The breeze was cool as they walked down the street. There were children playing in a park across the road. Alex pointed at them and laughed.  She loved the sound of his laugh.  Suddenly, he was across the street with them, playing with them.  He had a ball and was tossing it with one of the boys, playing keep away from another.  The second was laughing and jumping up to try to get the ball from him.  Alex tossed the ball again and looked back to her.  He stopped laughing and looked at her with concern.  She had tears falling down her cheeks.  He came back across to street to her and wiped her tears.

“Do not cry, Kroshka.”

“I love you so much Alex,” she said. “Why can’t we be together? Why don’t you love me?”

He brushed the hair away from her face and lifted her chin so that she looked him in the eye.

“I do love you, Kroshka,” he whispered softly, kissing her lips and holding her tight. “I do love you.”

Zoey woke to the small empty room, quiet because the game show had ended.  She rolled over, buried her face in the pillow and wept.

Chapter Thirty-one (translated from Russian)

He was still fighting with himself as he bounded through the doors of the Hotel National.  He headed up the stairs in the foyer when Dmitry called out to him.

“Mr. Ovechkin, is there something wrong?”

Alex considered ignoring him, but hesitated long enough to say, “I need to see Ms. Simmons.”

He started back up the steps and was halted by Dmitry once more.

“But, Sir, she is not there.”

Alex turned back to him, crossing the room quickly, “Where then?”

Dmitry’s face fell. Alexander Ovechkin was a very imposing man and it seemed this news might not be something he wanted to hear. 

“She is gone, Sir,” he said, as matter of fact as he could manage under Mr. Ovechkin’s piercing glare.

“Gone? Where?”

“She has left already for Budapest.”

“Her flight wasn’t until this afternoon. Why has she left already?”  Alex’s voice held a note of panic that was not lost on the concierge.

“Sir, she called down earlier this morning and asked for my help in getting an earlier flight,” he said as gently as he could.

“Earlier? WHY?”

Dmitry hesitated, reflecting on the conversation.  The girl had been quiet sad. She was a very kind woman and despite himself, Dmitry had found himself looking forward to her smile and the kind word that she would have for him each day. She never failed to say good morning to him and call him by name after he had insisted upon it the first day.  She had never demanded anything. When there was something that she had needed, she always asked with gentleness, as if he would be doing a favor for her. She was the kindest American that he had ever come in contact with. When she had asked for his help in getting an earlier flight, he had been happy to help her.  When she had come down, she had thanked him for making her stay so comfortable.

I will miss Moscow very much. It is so beautiful here, she had said and he could see the tears brimming in her eyes.  She had taken a deep breath and waved at him before she stepped into the taxi. He found himself being quite sad for her, knowing that the city was not what she was going to miss most.

“She said she needed to go. She was ready, but her flight was not for hours. She said she wanted to get to Budapest earlier, if possible.”

“When did she leave?” Alex asked, his tone still hopeful.

Dmitry looked at the clock on the wall behind him and sighed.

“Sir, her flight would have left over an hour ago,” he said slowly. “I am sorry.”

Alex let out a defeated sigh.  He walked slowly back out to his car.  The sunshine mocked the gloom inside him. 

She was gone.

Chapter Thirty (translated from Russian)

Alex stood up from Mishka’s couch and threw the Wii controller across the room.

“This stupid game!” he growled angrily.

“Hey, man.  Don’t break it!” Mishka complained, retrieving the controller and inspecting it.

“It already broken. Don’t work right.”

“It is not. What is wrong with you today?”

Alex just sat back down and grumbled.

“Is this about the American?”

“Her name is Zoey,” he said quietly.

“Oh, so good-bye was full of tears, was it?”

“Nyet,” he stated. “Just good-bye.”

“Oh? She made it easy for you then. You should be happy!”

“What do you mean?” Alex questioned him.  He was still in a cross mood and Mishka hesitated before answering him.

“Olga talked to her. She said that Zoey was talking about watching you play hockey.  She seemed to think that this girl really expected the affair to continue,” he said cautiously. 

“Why would Olga think that?” he asked.  He was confused. This did not sound like the girl he said good-bye to this morning.

Mishka hesitated again.  He did not like the way his friend was acting. This American was gone now and things could get back to normal. 

“Sasha, you enjoyed her, now it time to move on. Why does it even matter?” he said, exasperated.

Alex got to his feet again and moved closer to his friend. “What did Olga say to her?”

“Take it easy, man. She told her not to get her hopes up. That it was a summer thing, that you could never choose a girl who wasn’t Russian. Come on, she did you a favor.”

“It none of her business. And not yours either.” Alex brushed past his friend and flung the door open.

“Sasha! She just a girl!”

The BMW roared down the road.  He questioned himself the whole way.  They could not be together for lots of reasons. He lived in a world she knew nothing about. He didn’t know anything about hers either. And she was not Russian. This would never change. Yet, still he found himself rushing back to the hotel. He had to talk to her. He had to know. Did she love him?  Did she put on a good face to save him from feeling guilty?  Did he break her heart?

He didn’t know why it would matter. Everything Mishka said was true except one thing.

She was not just a girl.

Chapter Twenty Nine

She took a deep breath and turned around. The room was dim and quiet and empty.  It was too quiet.  She quickly turned on the television and though it was in Russian and she didn’t understand much of it, the sound was soothing and dispelled the overwhelming loneliness in the room. She brushed away a single tear defiantly and pulled her luggage from the closet.  She tossed the case on the bed and unzipped the empty bag. It would not take her long to fill it.  She busied herself in the bathroom, putting away her toiletries, finishing her hair. She had many things to pack. She had collected a few things in Moscow and St. Petersburg that made her wonder if she could make it all fit.  She smiled to herself thinking it was a good thing the hand painted Russian dolls could nest inside each other.  She remembered the story Alex told her when they purchased them.  His mother was not home very often when he was small. She was competing in basketball at that time.  But every time she would have to leave again after a visit, he would find the same nesting dolls sitting by his bed.  There would be a small prize inside, sometimes it was only a coin or a piece of candy, but it was always there and always had something just for him inside.  He said he knew she was thinking of him.  She never failed to remember to do it and so she never failed to remember him.  The story touched Zoey so much that she had to have those dolls.  She smiled as she nestled them into her luggage.  These dolls were painted with animals.  The largest was, of course, a bear.  She had already picked a spot for them in her loft in New York.   There was a bright window sill in her bedroom where they would reside when she finally got home. 

But home was still far away and she must think of Budapest now.  She opened each of the drawers in the chest and removed her clothes, depositing them in the suitcase neatly. She had done a really good job of distracting herself with packing until she reached the last drawer. She opened it and her heart dropped.  On the top of her pajamas was a red t-shirt with the Capitals logo on the front.  She had worn his shirt to sleep in just the other night.  Hesitantly, she reached inside the drawer pulling it out.  It was very soft.  She lifted it to her nose and held it against her cheek.  It still smelled like him.  She sat on the edge of the bed and took a deep breath.  I will never smell that again, she thought.  She buried her face in the fabric and the tears finally took over.  She slid down the edge of the bed to rest on the floor and wrapped her arms around her knees and cried.  The grief overtook her for a few minutes. Her mind raced with thoughts of his touch, his kiss, the way it felt to have his strong arms around her.

 Why? her heart screamed. Why did she have to meet him?  She’d been doing just fine all alone. She’d been alone for a long time. She didn’t need him. She didn’t need anyone.  Why did he have to come into her life, make her love him and then break her heart? 

The tears streamed down her cheeks and she angrily brushed them away. 

“I wish I’d never met you,” she said out loud, wadding up the t-shirt and throwing it across the room.  She sniffed and stared at the t-shirt.  She took a few deep breaths.  She didn’t mean that.   It sounded completely ridiculous to her.  He’d given her so much joy the past two weeks.  No, she was not going to waste her energy or tarnish those memories by being mad at him.  She got to her feet and crossed the room to pick up the t-shirt.  She held it briefly to her chest, then folded it carefully and placed it in the suitcase.   

She busied herself with the rest of her packing and sat back down on the bed when it was completed.  She glanced at the clock on the nightstand.  Four hours.  There were four hours left until she needed to leave for the airport.  She sighed.  She glanced around the empty room and made a decision.  She picked up the hotel phone and dialed.

Chapter Twenty-eight

She was sleeping next to him, her fingers entwined with his.  Her hair still smelled faintly of vanilla. He liked the way she smelled.  He loved how soft her skin was. One of his favorite things was having her sleeping in his arms.  It made him feel strong and powerful that she felt safe and comfortable enough to sleep with his arms wrapped around her.  Her soft breathing was very soothing, but it was his turn not to be able to sleep. He kept seeing her smile.  It was different now.  She clearly had leaving on her mind. She hadn’t wanted to talk about Budapest. He was bewildered by her. She acted like everything was okay. She didn’t seem upset, just quiet. He had been afraid that she was attached more than he expected.  He didn’t want to hurt her. But it seemed he was wrong about how much she felt for him. There had been no talk of trying to see each other again, no heartbreak that he could see.  He had to admit, the idea of not seeing her anymore was a little unsettling for him.  He would miss her.  But he had to go back to the States and it didn’t matter what he felt, it wasn’t something that was going to continue. It was impossible.  She had her own life and he was going back to his. He’d wanted their last night to be one to remember. He didn’t think it was one he was likely to forget.

She stirred slightly next to him. She made a quiet whimper.  Her body twitched.  She seemed to be dreaming. She stilled again and he closed his eyes hoping for sleep before the morning creeped up on him.  But in just a couple of minutes she groaned in her sleep again. He rubbed her arm gently.  Suddenly, she sat up crying out his name. 

“Kroshka?”

“Oh, Alex,” she turned and buried her head in his chest, clinging to him tightly.

“I am here,” he shushed her and stroked her hair. She was trembling.  “What was dream?”

“I… I was running and I couldn’t stop.  I was trying to get somewhere, but it kept getting farther away instead of closer. There was something I was supposed to find.  And then there was something behind me.  I don’t know. It made me scared.”

“You called my name.”

“I did?” she asked.

“Da.”

“Oh, well, I don’t know. Maybe I wanted you to wake me up,” she smiled at him weakly and he kissed her lightly on the forehead.

“Is it time to get up?” she asked.

“Not quite yet. Close your eyes. I am here.”

They dozed for a little while longer, until the sun was no longer creeping, but clearly present.   He looked at her with his sleepy, blue eyes and her heart threatened to break.  She kissed him softly and ran her hands along his strong, bare arms one last time.  She breathed deeply and tossed back the covers, slipping out of bed.  He caught her hand as she stood, stopping her.

“Just a quick shower,” she said.  He pulled her back toward him and kissed her again before nodding and releasing her hand.

She let the warm water envelope her, carrying all her cares down the drain.  She refused to mourn yet. She took a deep breath and allowed the stream to soften her tense muscles. She was afraid she would not be able to say good-bye without crying. She didn’t want to let him go. She didn’t want to go to Budapest anymore. She didn’t want to go home. She didn’t want to be away from him for a second.   Tears brimmed in her eyes and she quickly washed them away under the shower.

Stop it Zoey, her mind scolded her.  You do want to finish your book. You don’t want to stay here forever. He will be leaving anyway.  Besides, you will never be Russian.

She dried off and slipped into the soft white robe hanging on the back of the door.  She took a deep breath and left the bathroom.

He was already dressed, sitting on the edge of the bed.  It took her a little by surprise. She had expected him to still be in bed. But clearly, good-bye was here sooner that she’d thought.  He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her.  She closed her eyes concentrating on the smell of him, how strong his arms felt around her.

“I have to go to gym this morning and to see Mishka.  I thought you would need time to pack.”

She nodded against his chest.  He held her for a long time until she finally looked up at him.  He took her face n his hands and gently kissed her forehead.  Then he kissed her one last time, deeply, but quick and whispered against her lips.

“Good-bye, Kroshka.”

And he turned and was gone.  She pushed the door closed and rested her forehead against the cool wood.

“I love you, Alex,” she finally said when no one was there to hear.